Sexual Abuse

Sexual abuse is any sexual behaviour directed toward a person who has power over, that same person. Such behaviour involves betrayal of that person's trust and may or may not involve physical contact.

It is possible for individuals who have been sexually abused not to have clear memories but have certain experiences that trigger intense feelings of fear, nausea and despair. These triggers can include specific sounds, tastes, smells, words, and touch.

Often the first step in healing from sexual abuse involves having an awareness that some type of violation occurred.

Sexual abuse survivors experience many of the reactions experienced by trauma victims and although not limited to sexual abuse survivors, the following reactions are common (Bass and Davis 1994):

Self Esteem:

• Feeling you are not a worthwhile person.
• Feeling bad, dirty, or ashamed of your self.
• Feeling self-destructive or suicidal.

Feelings:

• Having trouble knowing how to feel .
• Being afraid of your feelings.
• Worrying about going crazy.
• Narrow range of feelings.
• Intrusive memories, images, nightmares, or reliving pas traumatic events.
• Increased anger or irritability.

Your body:

• Difficulty in being aware of what your body is telling you.
• Intentionally hurting yourself or abusing your body.
• Disruption in sleep patterns.

Intimacy:

• Finding it difficult to trust others.
• Experiencing panic when people get too close.
• Difficulty in making a commitment.
• Involving self with someone who reminds you of an abuser or someone you know is not good for you.

Sexuality:

• Difficulties "staying present" during sexual intimacy.
• Experiencing numbness or panic while having sex.
• Avoiding or pursuing sex you really don't want.
• Experiencing "flashbacks" during sex.

If you think you may have been sexually abused, speaking to a counsellor may be extremely helpful in the healing process of being an abuse victim to becoming an abuse survivor and beyond.

Resource info: The Courage to Heal. Ellen Bass and Laura Davis. New York: Harper and Row, 1994.